Post by Elien :: Jake on Jun 5, 2009 22:04:26 GMT -5
(( Oh ho ho. Fun little oneshot thing. Might start a thread based off of it later xD ))
*Ring ring*
…
*Ring ring*
…
*Ring ring*
“Nnng.”
*beep*
“What.”
“Oh good! You answered!”
“…”
“Elien?”
“..Do you know what time it is?”
“Uh..Hold on. I have a watch…somewhere..ah! There you are. Uh…oh. Whoa, it’s—“
“Uh-huh.”
“Wow.”
“Yup.”
“I s’pose 2 am is a little late. Or…early, I guess.”
“A little. You know. Just a bit.”
“You sound upset.”
“Pfffft. I was only sound asleep like two seconds ago.”
"…Were you dreaming?”
“Hn?”
“Y’know. Dreaming.”
“Yeah. Sure. I was.”
“What about?”
“Jesus, Jake, what is this? 20 Questions? I hate 20 Questions—“
“I know, and no it’s not. I’m just curious.”
“Tch.”
“Well?”
“Ragh…Well what?”
“Well, what were you dreaming about?”
"…Oh. Oh, it was awful. Lemme explain the situation mmkay?”
“Okay.”
“So, I was asleep right? Yeah, this awesome deep sort of sleep, yeah? And all of a sudden this guy comes and wakes me up. And he starts asking me all these questions. And won’t let me go back to sleep. Even though I’m dead tired.”
“Bastard!”
“Ha.”
“Oh. Oh, if I was in that dream I’d skin him for you.”
“Lovely.” *yawn* “..Notice anything?”
“Hm? Anything what?”
“You know. Similarities? Any of those?”
"…In what?”
“Bah, nevermind. Look, Jake, why are you calling me?”
“Because I’m not used to this. I’m not used to you and me being separated. I mean…you’re out in the field and I’m—“
“Sick as a damn dog, Jake.”
“But…nn. Elien. I don’t like—“
“Fuck, Jake, you had a fever of 102 when I left, you idiot.”
“I’d still rather be out there with you. Honestly though, how many times have you and I been on missions and not together?”
“I could probably count that number on one hand.”
“Exactly. Four times, including now.”
“Holy Hell, really? Man, I was just guessin’—“
“First time was our first year in Pravus. You snuck a mission and didn’t—“
“—Tell you about it. Ha, I remember that. First time you really ever yelled at me, I think.”
“And because of me not being there, you had to go and be extra reckless—“
“Heyheyhey. That Rhydon charged me first. I didn’t even do anything. And even if you were there, it still would have broken my arm anyway.”
“But we don’t know that! And we never will!”
*cough*”Spazz”*cough*
“Second time you were sick and I had to go and do the mission. Recon. Remember?”
“You didn’t even bring me a souvenir.”
“Third time, you snuck off again. What is with you and doing that?”
“Yeah. Twice in twenty years is so repetitive.”
*hackchokecoughwheeze*
“Jesus, Jake, hang up the damn phone and go to bed. You moron, if you die on me before I get back—“
“I’m—“ *cough* “—Fine.”
"… Hey, Jake?”
“Yes?”
“You know these things run on batteries right? Well my phone’s about to die. And really, I’m only supposed to use this things for emergencies.”
“This is an emergency!”
“How is this an emergency!”
“I miss yooou!”
“You prissy girl, I swear to God I’ll kill you myself if you don’t get some sleep right now!”
“…” *cough*
“Yeah. That’s what I thought. Now—“
“I’m not hanging up.”
"…What.”
“I’m not going to. Damn it, Elien, I swear, I’m addicted to your voice.”
“Don’t go all sappy on me. Don’t do it.”
“And I’m worried about you. What if something happens?”
“I’m made of fuckin’ rock, Jake. I’m good.”
“But what…what if—“
“As I’ve said before, Jakey, this thing’s batteries are running low. Emergencies only. This isn’t an emergency. What if a real emergency happens? And I’ve got no batteries left? Like what if some psycho bandit jumps me out of nowhere and I can’t call for backup—“
“PSYCHO BANDIT.”
"…What?”
“GOD. What if that HAPPENS? WHERE WILL I BE?”
“Uh…asleep?”
“EXACTLY. What help would I be? I’d be useless! I won’t be able to help rescue you from a psycho bandit if I’m in bed!”
"…Jake, don’t you dare. Don’t—“
“Don’t worry, Elien! I’ll be right there. I’ll get a signal from your phone. I’ll track you down. Don’t worry.”
“Jake—“
“No psycho bandit’s going to come near my Elien. No damn sir. Sit tight, Elien! Your prince charming is on his way!”
“You are NOT going to—”
*beep*
"…Jake. Oh ho. Jake. Jake, say something.”
…
“Jake. Seriously.”
…
"…Oh, he’s dead. Missy, I’m going to kill him. I’m going to kill him ‘till he’s dead.”
*beep*
*Ththmp*
”Fucking…moron. God, I hope Jeanne’s around him. I hope she sits on him. Stupid—What do you mean the phone’s not off? I hit the little button and—Fuck, the green light means it’s still on? Stupid…I hate phones.”
“Damn…phone.”
*Beep*
*Beep beep*
“The light won’t turn off!”
*beep beep beep beep*
“I SWEAR TO GOD I’M GOING TO KILL HIM IF HE SHOWS UP. DAMN PHONE. DAMN JAKE. HUSBANDS SUCK. AND SO DO PHONES. AND—“ *Beep*
*Ring ring*
…
*Ring ring*
…
*Ring ring*
“Nnng.”
*beep*
“What.”
“Oh good! You answered!”
“…”
“Elien?”
“..Do you know what time it is?”
“Uh..Hold on. I have a watch…somewhere..ah! There you are. Uh…oh. Whoa, it’s—“
“Uh-huh.”
“Wow.”
“Yup.”
“I s’pose 2 am is a little late. Or…early, I guess.”
“A little. You know. Just a bit.”
“You sound upset.”
“Pfffft. I was only sound asleep like two seconds ago.”
"…Were you dreaming?”
“Hn?”
“Y’know. Dreaming.”
“Yeah. Sure. I was.”
“What about?”
“Jesus, Jake, what is this? 20 Questions? I hate 20 Questions—“
“I know, and no it’s not. I’m just curious.”
“Tch.”
“Well?”
“Ragh…Well what?”
“Well, what were you dreaming about?”
"…Oh. Oh, it was awful. Lemme explain the situation mmkay?”
“Okay.”
“So, I was asleep right? Yeah, this awesome deep sort of sleep, yeah? And all of a sudden this guy comes and wakes me up. And he starts asking me all these questions. And won’t let me go back to sleep. Even though I’m dead tired.”
“Bastard!”
“Ha.”
“Oh. Oh, if I was in that dream I’d skin him for you.”
“Lovely.” *yawn* “..Notice anything?”
“Hm? Anything what?”
“You know. Similarities? Any of those?”
"…In what?”
“Bah, nevermind. Look, Jake, why are you calling me?”
“Because I’m not used to this. I’m not used to you and me being separated. I mean…you’re out in the field and I’m—“
“Sick as a damn dog, Jake.”
“But…nn. Elien. I don’t like—“
“Fuck, Jake, you had a fever of 102 when I left, you idiot.”
“I’d still rather be out there with you. Honestly though, how many times have you and I been on missions and not together?”
“I could probably count that number on one hand.”
“Exactly. Four times, including now.”
“Holy Hell, really? Man, I was just guessin’—“
“First time was our first year in Pravus. You snuck a mission and didn’t—“
“—Tell you about it. Ha, I remember that. First time you really ever yelled at me, I think.”
“And because of me not being there, you had to go and be extra reckless—“
“Heyheyhey. That Rhydon charged me first. I didn’t even do anything. And even if you were there, it still would have broken my arm anyway.”
“But we don’t know that! And we never will!”
*cough*”Spazz”*cough*
“Second time you were sick and I had to go and do the mission. Recon. Remember?”
“You didn’t even bring me a souvenir.”
“Third time, you snuck off again. What is with you and doing that?”
“Yeah. Twice in twenty years is so repetitive.”
*hackchokecoughwheeze*
“Jesus, Jake, hang up the damn phone and go to bed. You moron, if you die on me before I get back—“
“I’m—“ *cough* “—Fine.”
"… Hey, Jake?”
“Yes?”
“You know these things run on batteries right? Well my phone’s about to die. And really, I’m only supposed to use this things for emergencies.”
“This is an emergency!”
“How is this an emergency!”
“I miss yooou!”
“You prissy girl, I swear to God I’ll kill you myself if you don’t get some sleep right now!”
“…” *cough*
“Yeah. That’s what I thought. Now—“
“I’m not hanging up.”
"…What.”
“I’m not going to. Damn it, Elien, I swear, I’m addicted to your voice.”
“Don’t go all sappy on me. Don’t do it.”
“And I’m worried about you. What if something happens?”
“I’m made of fuckin’ rock, Jake. I’m good.”
“But what…what if—“
“As I’ve said before, Jakey, this thing’s batteries are running low. Emergencies only. This isn’t an emergency. What if a real emergency happens? And I’ve got no batteries left? Like what if some psycho bandit jumps me out of nowhere and I can’t call for backup—“
“PSYCHO BANDIT.”
"…What?”
“GOD. What if that HAPPENS? WHERE WILL I BE?”
“Uh…asleep?”
“EXACTLY. What help would I be? I’d be useless! I won’t be able to help rescue you from a psycho bandit if I’m in bed!”
"…Jake, don’t you dare. Don’t—“
“Don’t worry, Elien! I’ll be right there. I’ll get a signal from your phone. I’ll track you down. Don’t worry.”
“Jake—“
“No psycho bandit’s going to come near my Elien. No damn sir. Sit tight, Elien! Your prince charming is on his way!”
“You are NOT going to—”
*beep*
"…Jake. Oh ho. Jake. Jake, say something.”
…
“Jake. Seriously.”
…
"…Oh, he’s dead. Missy, I’m going to kill him. I’m going to kill him ‘till he’s dead.”
*beep*
*Ththmp*
”Fucking…moron. God, I hope Jeanne’s around him. I hope she sits on him. Stupid—What do you mean the phone’s not off? I hit the little button and—Fuck, the green light means it’s still on? Stupid…I hate phones.”
“Damn…phone.”
*Beep*
*Beep beep*
“The light won’t turn off!”
*beep beep beep beep*
“I SWEAR TO GOD I’M GOING TO KILL HIM IF HE SHOWS UP. DAMN PHONE. DAMN JAKE. HUSBANDS SUCK. AND SO DO PHONES. AND—“ *Beep*
